Sunday, August 24, 2008

I have nothing to live for....

Well maybe thats a 'slight' exaggeration but oh my, I am a miserable shit at the moment.

A couple of months ago I kicked my dreadful nicotine habit and then got the bright idea that I should now get in shape also.

Bad idea, terrible, the worst in the world.

I joined the gym a couple of weeks ago and felt very superior as I drove there in my shiny new trainers and bouncy gym type hairstyle. I sneered at the fatties waiting at the bus stop and brilliantly ignored the ever expanding brioche that was threatening to overlap my seat belt.

20 minutes on the treadmill, hooray!
15 minutes on the bike, huzzah!
a few ladylike crunches down in the weights room, I was going to be trim, taut and terrific in no time.

I chirpily signed up for my 3 sessions with the personal trainer and was very excited last thursday when my assessment with Christiaaaaaaaannnnn took place.
So, I could only do 10 push ups, 14 sit ups and was puffing and sweating like a cheap knockhouse whore after 3 minutes of stepping up and down on one of those frightful little boxes but Im sure thats about normal for my age (all of 32) right??

WRONG WRONG WRONG!!

I went back today for my results and was shocked to my very wobbly core to find out I have a fitness age of 45 years old!!!
Some stats for your reading pleasure..
Body fat: 22% - 21 years old (must admit feel a little bit smirky about that)
Flexibility: 15cm - 18 years old (hee hee)
upper body and core strength: 56 years old (er, not so good)

but the very worst of it...

.....
.....
....
Cardio fitness...

....
..

78 year old.

Oh. My. Freakin. God.

Im going to hide in a corner with a creme filled donut if anyones looking for me.

44 comments:

Ann said...

Hang in there! I'm probably in the same boat, too! I am so out of shape now and sometimes it feels a little embarrasing cause I used to do track and field. Keep at it and you'll be on your way to have a 20 year old fitness age.

Curly Girl Glass said...

you're very brave! I'd never do one of those assesments because I'm afraid of what I'd find out. Better not to know...

Blackfeatherfarm said...

Hey congrats on kicking the smoking... that is no small feat. I have never smoked but I have heard all the stories. Truly that is BIG. Great post {handing you a row} I'm in the same unfit boat, and a few years older than you ! Sounds like you will do well though, good luck, I'm back to working out with ya !

Unknown said...

good luck! i used to smoke a little bit in high school an a little bit in college and it gets easier! I promise! You are doing the right thing.

Giftbearer said...

You've got to start somewhere and at least you're taking action. That's what's important. All that will get better the longer you work at it.

Oh by the way, I was looking for where to leave a comment on your previous post and couldn't find the link to click on, but I just wanted to say that I agree with you totally! I find it so silly and juvenile when people say they won't buy from somebody because of an opinion they have in the Etsy forum. I buy from people if I like their work. That's my only criteria. Unless they're a rapist or a wife-beater or something on that level what they do in their personal life is irrelevant; their political opinions, taste in music, or what charities they support, etc, make no difference to me as a buyer.

AshleySpatula said...

Hey, I am only 24 and my stats are most likely around the same lol. I'm an almost fatty :)
But congrats for doing it, you are braver than me!

GreenSpaceGoods said...

Oh honey. Trust me, if I were there to work out with you, you'd feel a lot better about that cardio number. ('cause I definitely don't have the body fat of a 21 year old. Mabye two of them…) Besides, that is probably all due to the nicotine habit, so with that gone, it should bounce back eventually. :)

Tia Colleen said...

My husband came home today, all excited about this new warrior workout routine hes discovered. Hes all about getting into amazing shape. So his shirt is soaked with sweat, his face is bright red, and hes telling me about the 150 squats that he did inbetween running 3 miles, ect ect, blah blah blah. All the while, I'm laying on the couch in sweats, with the stomach flu, 5 months pregnant, and unable to sit up without groaning. Ugh. You guys make me hide my lazy face in shame, haha.

Chaffee Street Cafe` said...

Try some Herbalife and after a few weeks, you will knock off about ten pounds and have loads more energy plus your will power will increase. It really works! Sincerely ... it is a fantastic and delicious way of life. It takes the guess work out of everything.

Anonymous said...

So look at it this way: It can only get better...

(I just started the 100 pushup thing. I know its a goofy promotion for a blog, but hey, the body seems to know when it's its time to fix itself and any exercise gets it going in the right direction)

Keep it up!

Anonymous said...

Goodness, you are so silly! I know how you feel though...I would not want to know my stats...I am probably over 100 years old on most categories. Just think of those other categories where you were a youngin! Weeeee!!!!

AMIT said...

Yeah that is really good that you left this bad habit.Smoking is very bad for us.

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